Why did I stop blogging for almost a year? When you are fighting with fibromyalgia and if you are at the same time "lost ", a lot of things are complicated… Fortunately, I've found my way. Want to know how? I’ll tell you everything! By the way, do you know that you have something to do with this? :)
There are a lot of reasons to stop blogging:
- you have no more time to write
- you don’t want to write anymore
- you're short on inspiration
- you have to deal with a lack of interest in the theme you've chosen
- your blog doesn't connect to its audience
- you never receive any comment
- you never get any feedback (or you’re only getting negative remarks!)
- you get no comments on social networks (and you feel lonely)
- you have a fear of success
- you don’t have time to answer to your readers
- etc.
Every day, writers face with such problems… and I’m not an exception! :) Since August 2014, when I created "Okean of Emotions", I have to deal regularly with some of these issues. But, if I have found my own way to handle this situation until May last year, I must admit that, from there, things got complicated for me…
What happened? What changed? Nothing has changed… but everything is different! :)
Fighting with fibromyalgia: "Я не здамся без бою! - I won’t give up without a fight!"
Nothing has changed because I have been suffering from chronic pain for several years.
I have to say that it's a mess... I'm not sure that heaven exists, but I can confirm that my body is already in hell! :) Many things are very, very complicated (I’m suffering from migraines, headaches, nausea, back pain, vertigo, pain in hands, in wrists, in knees, in feet, etc.) and every day is a fight just to go to work and to do a few things at home…
Well, I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. :) But I think it’s important to explain why you don’t hear from me for several days/weeks/months.
The thing is that sometimes, I just can’t write: my body is wracked with pain, and during a few days, I cannot post on social networks and on my blog - and I cannot answer your comments either. Sorry…
Since there is still no way to cure fibromyalgia, I know that I would never go better… And from time to time, I lose all hope.
Well, this has been a challenging year for me… But I feel a bit better since the 10th of November. So… Carpe Diem! :) And, even if my whole body hurts, I repeat this mantra every day: "Я не здамся без бою! - I won’t give up without a fight!" This song always gives me strength and courage. :)
Okean Elzy - Без бою
"I’m just completely lost!" - Bill Murray, "Lost in translation" - Sofia Coppola
Everything is different because… one day (well, it was "one night" :) ) suddenly (and forever) my vision of the world, time and space has changed. And then I was thinking…
Life is full of surprises and, when you see the intimate part of you in someone else’s eyes, you’re "Lost in translation"… Life loses its meaning... but at the same time, everything is clearly obvious to you because this person gives you a new ‘reference grid’ to understand the world, to understand who you are, and where you are going to!
This is a strange paradox, and it affects your life so severely that it looks like an internal tsunami… the kind of thing you would like to avoid happening. :)
Svyatoslav Vakarchuk - "Цунамі - Tsunami"
It’s like an overflowing river that washes away your heart, your mind, and your soul. This river carries everything in its path: your "protective shell/armor" turns into dust and all that left is ruins... So, you have no choice but to look within yourself and to face your own fears, to face your pain. It hurts… but it brings you back to basics and in the end, you learn a lot about life. What is meant to be, is meant to be! :)
But honestly, I have to say that for a few months, I could not write anything and I could not learn the Ukrainian language; for a few weeks, I could not sing, and I also could not listen to Okean Elzy… :( The situation was serious! :) But there was nothing I could do: I just had to give it time, let the things play out…
Now, things are going better: since a few weeks, Ukraine "calls me" again and I can't resist! :) Okean Elzy fans ask questions, they would like to read new posts on my blog; with Okean Elzy France, I’ve been invited to participate in a new project… Now, it’s time for me to come back to blogging!
Where to find strength when life knocks you down?
Maybe some of you are suffering from chronic pain too and/or some may have difficult moments - because life is not a bed of roses… Hold on! Don’t give up! Even if things are difficult, we can deal with your pain: writing this blog is, according to the neurologist, a part of the treatment for me (turns out, he was right!) I'm sure you too have found something that helps you feel a bit better - if not, I'm sure you’ll find it soon. We just have to have faith. And I can assure you that if you repeat our mantra "Я не здамся без бою! - I won’t give up without a fight!" every day, you’ll see things in a different light and you’ll find your way! :)
Fibromyalgia, Okean Elzy France, to be "Lost in translation" and to write posts... It’s my way. Sometimes I find it difficult… but it’s a chance: it gives me wings! :)
Thank you all for your support. Thanks for being here by my side.
Take care,
AleXa
See also:
- Okean Elzy: 'Коли тобi важко' - 'When you find it difficult'... Because I had bad times!
- About Fibromyalgia
